Sunday, October 11, 2009

kinda scarce

ok, so i have been kinda scarce lately.

first, i have to confess. i am addicted to some facebook games. it mostly took root over the last two weeks... when i discovered sorority life. i actually added people as facebook friends that i didn't know, just so i could get more "sisters." buying virtual hummer stretch limos with virtual money from a virtual job.

what is with this weird world? and why did i get sucked in?

distraction.

right now i have too much going on at work. i come home at the end of the day and my brain is just so completely overloaded that i look for the thing that is going to take me as far away from reality as possible.

it's why some people watch TV for four hours a night. or more.

but here is where i would like to say, "thank god for eric."

we? we went to the library the other night, at his suggestion. friends, the library used to be my haven. books used to be my lifeline. but since i have technologized and digitized myself so much, i rarely ever read anymore.

so, as of today i am on a mission. i want to get back to books. back to basics. read about pakistan. italy. manet. the civil war. homesteading. i want to teach myself something using library books. just like in the old days. maybe some craft or photography technique. but something. something to get me engaged with my life instead of distracted. i don't want to waste time. i dont' want to wake up when i'm 50 and not know what i accomplished between now and then. i want to make meaning in my life, more than i do now.

i want friends, moments, creating, sharing, and love. i don't want to be a level 51 socialite in sorority life on facebook.