Saturday, November 21, 2009

two thanksgiving memories.

i have two thanksgiving memories that are special to me.

in 2005, i was alone for thanksgiving. i remember waking up and watching the thanksgiving day parade and eating nutri-grain bars with tears rolling down my face.

i spent the whole day alone until dinner, when i went to a friend of a friend's house. i remember feeling pretty awkward, because i didn't know many people there. i only went because someone had opened her home. the meal was delicious. afterward, i went for a drive with two friends i didn't know very well. we drove up to the natchez trace and pulled over to watch the sun set. then we drove to opryland and took a twirl through the parking lot before coming home for the evening.

it was, by far, the loneliest thanksgiving i had ever experienced. i was on the verge of tears for most of the day. i was thankful not to be physically alone, but it was a very rough day for me.

in 2006, i decided to take thanksgiving into my own hands. i booked my tickets and flew to visit my lifelong friend, melissa, and her husband, charlie in corpus christi. i spent the week relaxed and with great friends. i forgot about the thanksgiving day parade. on thanksgiving day, we put together a seafood boil, left a burner on low, and went to the beach. when we came home, we whipped up some rice and we feasted.

it was, by far, the most relaxed thanksgiving i have ever experienced.

this thanksgiving, i am not sure what to do. i could go with my parents to my dad's family gathering. it's usually crowded and loud, and i don't think i have been in awhile... it doesn't seem super appealing, because i really want to relax. but then i remember that year in 2005, where i would have given anything to be in a hot, crowded house where the conversation turned to politics after 15 minutes... just to be around people who know me.

sorry i can't really tie all of this up into a nice package, here. it's just what's on my mind.